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The year is 1929 in the wonderful Big Apple, New York City! The economy is at an all-time high that seems sustainable enough, the culture is one of excess and hedonism, and the term "Roaring 20s" never felt more appropriate. Not to mention the mysterious "stand abilities" that have been appearing in citizens, visitors, and any other select few who may be in the city for the last forty or so years. These abilities have been appearing with seemingly no explanation, as if the city itself is granting them! But, granting them for what? Or for whom? Rules, because I have to Character App

Yeah, ENFP-T again. At this point I'd be horribly confused if I got anything else.

Was waiting on seeing the cast to see if my idea would work. Seems it will. [Joker's Wild] Character Name: listed as "Soitsu" Age: listed as being 15 years old Gender: male [Appearance] Height: 5'7" Weight: 133 lbs [Backstory] Soitsu was unknown to the government until he was (allegedly) 8 years old, at which point he had no known family. He was found living in the street on his own. Despite this obviously dangerous living situation, things seemed to be going alright for him, and he even had some money for himself. He claimed to have gotten it as a street performer, but a more accurate description would be "hustler". After he was placed in a local orphanage, he was given the standard quirk examination most would have received when they were younger. In it, he successfully flipped a coin and had it land on heads 100 consecutive times, followed by tails another 39 times. At this point the examiner stopped him and told him to predict the next flip. With a simple "I don't know how to tell the future" he flipped the coin and it landed perfectly on its edge, balanced between heads and tails. It was quickly determined that his quirk was luck manipulation, and seemed to be involuntary. -7 years later- Soitsu woke up in a cold metal chair, with a pair of leather restraints around his wrists. He blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to his environment, doing his best to ignore the full ache in the back of his head, the heat surrounding it indicating a heavy bruise forming. In front of him stood a burly man in a suit, picking through the contents of a small briefcase before delicately, almost too much so for one of his size, pulling out a pair of pliers. Even in the dim light from the cloudy, uncovered bulb hanging from the ceiling, Soitsu could see that the tool was stained with blood. "Ah, so you woke up." The apparent torturer had a voice that was too polite for his profession. "You stole from the wrong people." Those 'wrong people,' as far as Soitsu could guess, were some or other quirkless gang. While the world had people that could lift a car without thinking twice and used that power to get whatever they wanted, those left without gifts in the crime world ended up banding together, making up for lack of individual strength with organization and sheer numbers. "You're going to die today, just so you know, but before that happens you'll tell us where the money is, in exchange for a bit less pain." Clearly, Soitsu was dealing with someone incredibly reasonable. "Listen," the boy said with a slow start, "I didn't steal anything. I'm sure I won more in your games than you'd like, but that was all by luck." Soitsu had talked his way out of plenty of sticky situations, but even as he tried now he had the sense that this wasn't going to be quite so easy. "Luck isn't a good excuse when it's your quirk," the man paused, gauging Soitsu's reaction to his words, "it wasn't too hard to figure out who you are, and what your MO is. Our connections stretch much further than you realize." With a pop of his neck, he brandished the pair of pliers, making his violent intent more than clear. "I'm sure you'll talk, but first you deserve some suffering for trying to weasel your way out of this." He took a step forward, and promptly fell forward, toward Soitsu. Without his knowledge his shoelaces had somehow ended up tangled together. With a loud CRACK, his face hit the chair's armrest, right beside his would-be victim's hand, before he fell the rest of the way down to the floor, lying motionless. "Holy shit! I hope that was on video, that's fucking hilarious!" Soitsu stood up, lifting his hands out of the bindings that were inexplicably left unfastened, before hunching over and laughing hysterically to himself. Gingerly stepping around the man who had planned to kill him, he worked his way out of the torture chamber and out into a much more docile-looking hallway. "Now, which way to go…" he looked back and forth, shrugging lazily, "guess I'll try my luck." Without spending any more time to consider his options, he strode down the hallway toward his right, casually glancing into each room he passed. One room in particular had a safe in the back, and he decided that was definitely worth looking into. He approached it and after staring for a few seconds, he simply tried the handle. As luck would have it, it was unlocked. With a smile, he took out a few wads of cash and shoved them into his pockets. Considering the circumstances of how he ended up in this place, things were going quite well. Of course, as he turned around, he saw that the room had been filled with about half a dozen of the mobsters, each with a gun pointed directly at him. Leaning back against the safe, Soitsu casually slammed it shut, spinning the wheel to lock it. "Hey guys! I was just taking a self-guided tour of your fort. Where are the monkey bars, again?" His laughter was drowned out by the sounds of gunfire as the group all let loose at Soitsu, who covered his ears with his hands as he wasn't in the mood for hearing damage today. After the firing stopped, Soitsu turned around to see the wall riddled with bullet holes, tracing the silhouette of his center of mass as every single one inexplicably missed. "Wow, that's actually pretty impressive! To think you guys shot around randomly without even aiming, and you STILL didn't hit me with a single shot!" This last remark must have been too much for one of the thugs, who pulled a second handgun out of his waistband and walked straight up to Soitsu. By the time he turned back toward the entourage, Soitsu found himself with a muzzle against his forehead. "You're really that unskilled that you have to get this close to line up a shot? What makes you think it will work this time?" The thug's face twisted into a snarl of rage, as he pulled the trigger to silence this stupid child. click click click click click No matter how many times he pulled the trigger, the pistol simply refused to fire. Soitsu tilted his head to the side, looking around the attacker's hand into his eyes, "Hey dumbass, you don't even have a mag in." With confusion, the man quickly turned the gun in his hand to check Soitsu's claim, but in the frustration of the moment fumbled his pistol and dropped it to the ground. As it turned out, the handgun was loaded. And that became abundantly clear to everyone as it hit the floor, the impact releasing the previously jammed firing pin and causing a single shot to be fired. Straight up, under its owner's chin, through his jaw, and out the top of his skull. After the shot echoed, the room was filled with silence for a few seconds, then "Just kidding. Guess it jammed. Anyone else want to try?" The group rushed out as quickly as they could, practically running over each other as Soitsu's laughter shifted from hysterical to maniacal. With a wicked grin and a twisted laugh, Soitsu strolled through the hideout, finding more and more things that he found hilarious. Enemies hitting each other with ricocheted shots, light fixtures falling on top of people, someone even managed to slip on a banana peel and fall down a staircase. As he passed through what seemed to be the kitchen, a faint whiff of a foul smell evidenced that gas had begun to leak from the oven. And so Soitsu made his merry way all the way to the exit, surrounded by constant chaos and misfortune. After stepping out, he made his way across the street before a familiar voice called out to him from behind. Looking over his shoulder, he saw the interrogator from when he first woke up, standing just inside the doorway, his own weapon drawn and pointed directly at Soitsu. His face was covered in blood, with his nose at a decidedly incorrect angle. "You son of a bitch, what the fuck did you do to all of them? What kind of monster are you???" "A lucky one." The man fired his gun at Soitsu, and as the bullet zipped a few inches to the right of his head, the hot gas coming from the muzzle ignited the natural gas that he had been unable to smell with his broken nose full of blood. I'm less than a second, the conflagration spread throughout the entire building, creating a blast that shook the very street. Shards of glass from the windows were launched everywhere, but none of them managed to so much as touch Soitsu. Soitsu giggled all the way back to the abandoned building he called home. That is, until he arrived and saw blue and red flashing lights. -2 hours later- "So, according to you, all of these events were not by your will, instead caused by the involuntary manifestation of your quirk?" The question came from a tall police officer with the face of a hamster. "Yup. I'm pretty sure if I had any control of the situation, the building wouldn't have exploded. And I wouldn't have been there in the first place." The officer sighed, shuffling through his papers. He hated dealing with kids who didn't know how to use their quirks. "Well, they are still finalizing everything, but with everything that happened today, as well as everything else on file, you are looking at charges for…" with an awkward squeek, he cleared his voice before continuing, "12 charges of felony illegal gambling, 17 charges of felony theft, numerous charges of unauthorized usage of quirk, and, as of today, 49 charges of involuntary manslaughter, as well as arson." Trying his best not to laugh at the staggering numbers he was presented with, Soitsu nodded slowly, "So, am I fucked, or is there a catch?" The officer's whiskers twitched, as he pulled a letter emblazoned with a large H from his papers, handing it to Soitsu. "In fact, there is. Either take this offer, or you'll be leaving in handcuffs." "I guess today really is my lucky day." [Personality] Soitsu is a natural-born comic, and a compulsive liar. This combination results in him constantly manipulating the truth, playing into others' weaknesses, and weaving fantastic tales, all just for a laugh. At the end of the day, his motivation behind pretty much everything he does amounts to some level of "I thought it would be funny." Despite his unorthodox upbringing and solitary lifestyle, he is incredibly charismatic and capable in social situations, skilled at telling people exactly what they want to hear. Unless, of course, making them upset would be funnier. By default, he is friendly to just about everyone he meets. After all, the more people he has laughing, the better his joke must be. The sort of people he has the most trouble tolerating are those with a lack of humor, but even then he finds it absolutely hilarious how his musings simply go right over their head. He really has no interest at all in becoming a hero, but Hairo Academy seems like a fantastic opportunity to get a few good jokes in. [Quirk] Luck. Soitsu's quirk alters probability fields around him, causing things to go favorably for him, and poorly for anyone who opposes him. He doesn't have control over how this comes into effect, but has a fairly good handle on how it will behave in whatever situation he may be in. Notably, his quirk doesn't seem to have any effect on digital mechanisms, or if it does the effect is not consistent. He has no explanation for this beyond "fucking RNG"

1.) English 2.) C 3.) Phyrexian 4.) Korean 5.) German Wow posts aren't automerged

Literally haven't been to 5 cons bruv. Don't really go to the anymore anyway.

1.) I really like how if you jump backward in Portal you go really fast, since source engine just gives backward momentum upon landing to prevent bunnyhopping. 2.) Ocarina of Time speedrun. Something something bottle, something something teleport to end of game cutscene. 3.) Is ledge cancelling a cheat? I love that shit. 4/5.) Idfk

Seems simple enough. I realistically don't know when I'll end up replying to this. I don't have plans to reinvolve myself with the community, I just honestly don't have the time, patience, or interest. So, if I reply instantly, cool, if I reply in a few days/weeks/months cool, if I never reply, cool. Just letting you know what you're signing up for with this.

Kefnet is a quite good ability attached to a 4/5 flyer for 4. He's gonna rock standard. Not to mention the obvious applications in edh. Bontu is absolutely fucking nuts. She doesn't feel quite notable for gitrog, as she will only trigger him once, but honestly she's pretty nuts in any deck where she feels remotely at home. I know my friend is going to make use of her in sek'kuar pod, and I'm heavily considering her for muldrotha when I get around to throwing blue into gitrog. Firemind Vessel is difficult to evaluate. I feel it's quite good in midrangey decks, allowing you to drop a 7 drop turn 5 without any outside ramp (turn 3 with Sol ring lol) and helping quite a lot to fix colors. I don't think it's great in control compared to hedron archive, as the option to draw at instant speed is by all means what made that card, but there are plenty of decks where coming in tapped isn't an issue, and the draw isn't needed. At the same time, in green it's overshadowed by explosive vegetation of all things, which I wouldn't say gives this a great prognosis. It's probably good, but I have no real clue where.

Awakening of Vitu-Ghazi is comically strong on the block. This set looked really weak at first, but is shaping up to be pretty good. EDIT: Illharg would be cool if he had haste. He doesn't have haste. Let's give him haste. This set has a RG rare control card. Let that sink in. Despite being land support, I don't think Nissa makes it into gitrog. Even if she doubled swamps, it just doesn't feel as great as I'd like. I'm probably picky.

So what you're saying, is that... Everyone is here

endbracket™

Bertha, the largest drill on Earth. She was comically difficult to maintain while digging under Seattle, but a feat of engineering nonetheless. use ortem, it all fits on one line.

You know the drill

Life points absolutely matter.

I know. That's the joke. Although I really don't have the time for this game (hello con season) I'm really enjoying plant as an addition after a few more hours of gameplay. She felt a bit too strong at first, but I think that is because people are still figuring out the counterplay. I can't say I know what that counterplay will be, but it seems she's most vulnerable from directly underneath, since she doesn't have any real landing options beyond using up b to get the fuck away and land somewhere else. Projectiles also have potential, since there isn't much plant can do beyond the range of the down b. She's got a pretty good approach speed and neutral game though, so this doesn't feel terribly reliable unless you're someone particularly slippery, and that limits kill options quite a lot.

Basically my point. Neither part would be remarkable without the other. Life gain that doesn't serve another purpose really has no place in constructed, unless that card gave incredibly powerful life gain (feed the clan comes to mind). Rev and Timely Reinforcements both provide card advantage, allowing one to stabilize. Radiant fountain had basically zero opportunity cost, along with some outside synergies. Creatures with lifelink have the advantage of, well, being creatures. I think revitalize does well to demonstrate exactly what it takes for life gain to be useful. It either does something else to advance your game state, or in this case it has benefits that prevent it from taking away from your game plan. Thinking about it in terms of other cards, I think this reminds me more of radiant fountain than anything.